The Discipline of Foreplay

unnamed    It’s easy to skip the foreplay and jump into things, but let’s be honest: It’s more exciting when we’ve earned it. When we’ve thought about it, seduced it, conversed with it…and it’s finally ours, it’s much more meaningful. And, the effect of achieving or attaining something that has been a point of focus has a much greater effect on our nervous systems than random events.

Larry Sharpe, my business coach, says business is like romance. There is a dance we must do to get to know and appreciate each other, vendor and client. It takes time.  Deeply appreciating the things we’ve “earned” is not limited to that crush who made your heart go pitter patter. We can even romance ourselves with the Joumorous acts of PREPARATION and ACCOMPLISHMENT. The more time we spend planning the greater the satisfaction…emotionally AND neurologically. Remember our friend dopamine, one of the major feel-good hormones responsible for decision making? It’s true. Your “hit” is bigger for completing tasks you perceive to have more value (especially when they once posed a threat to you and no longer do. Relief is a big neurological flood of turn-on).

Can’t you just imagine pressing “Send” on a project you’ve been working on for months? You know that feeling! Freedom, excitement, power…and it can certainly translate into the bedroom. After all, shouldn’t we be rewarded for our productivity? 😉

Too flaccid for foreplay? We talked about how the greatest clutter is self-judgement. But self-pity and overall disorganization are strong runners-up. If your billing system is not set up, you cannot bill the client. If your calendar is not up-to-date, you cannot set up an appointment with a big client…etc. You cannot go big if you’re a mess. If your system is not a strong buck, it’ll be hard to make one. (#punintended). Take responsibility for your satisfaction and make changes that allow you to receive more success.

Fabulous, Effective, Foreplay: Everything is project management. From doing the laundry to closing a 10M dollar deal, there is a beginning, middle, and end that require time and attention.

Prepare.

Review and confirm.

Set yourself up to win.

Make changes as you go.

Take action.

Accomplish.

Receive.

Having the discipline and restraint to fully prepare before you begin will infuse your project with excitement, AND a much greater likelihood of success.

It’s hard, but try it. Watch how much you enjoy the discipline of foreplay…AND what follows.

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